What I did on my summer vacation
My family and I went to Costa Rica. The highlight of the trip for me was rappelling down waterfalls. For the uninitiated (like I was until a few weeks ago), rappelling is the way that rock climbers go down rocks. With a harness attached to a rope at the top, you "hop" down the side of the rock by pushing yourself off with your feet, making an arc in the air and coming back into contact with the rock a little further down. The rope, and the people controlling it on the top and the bottom, keep you from killing yourself. The team that managed our group of tourists were all 20 something Ticos (natives of Costa Rica). They spoke perfect English and looked very fit. They also did not share the extreme aversion to risk that I have - as a lawyer and a mother. We tromped through the rain forest for about 20 minutes and then one of the guides gave us a 3 minute lesson on rappelling. Then we were all expected to rappel down a 180 foot waterfall. Right!
We did this in pairs and I went down with Harrison, my 13 year old. He was totally unconcerned - merely eager for his chance. I was hyperventilating. As I approached the precipice, I made the mistake of looking down. Yikes! It was far and there were rocks and water and no net. This was a real rain forest - not Disneyland. Here is what I mean...it was the real deal.
Not only did I do it, I did a total of 5 waterfalls (well, ok, everyone in the group did 5 but I was probably the most scared of anyone). With each waterfall, my exhilaration and self esteem grew. I was stronger, braver and more agile than I thought I was. By the end of that morning, I felt happy, light, wet and totally at peace. So here is my question...
Why do so many of us put ourselves and our own happiness after our children our partners and our jobs? It's a common female trait to put yourself last but it's not the right thing to do for your family, your work, or you.
Research has shown that when people are happy, they are more productive, more creative and make better ethical decisions. Happiness also lowers cortisol levels in the blood which, in turn, lowers the risk of heart attack, stroke and other stress related illnesses. The Hearthmath Institute in California has shown that, by thinking thoughts of love and appreciation, we can actually alter our heart beat into a regular rhythm that is much healthy than the ragged heart beat that occurs when you are stressed or feeling fear.
My question to you is - do you think your happiness is important? If so, what do you do to ensure that you are happy?
Loved this last posting and wonderful pictures. You really did look scared, but in control---a memorable experience that will remain a highlight in your travel experiences. There have been many things in life I avoided because I feared I would fail, but when I tackled some of them and succeeded,my self esteem and happiness really soared. Happy to learn it's physically healthy as well.
Gigi
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Hi Gigi,
Thanks very much for your comment. Fear and self-doubt can be huge obstacles to happiness. If we let fear keep us from trying new things or taking risks, it shrinks our world and that is not good for anyone. For me, happiness is expansiveness. The bigger my world, the more people in my life, the happier I feel. Whenever I feel fear creeping in, I try to confront it and take it apart - where is the fear coming from? What is the worst that can happen? Many times, by shining light on the fear, the shadows (and the fear) recede.
You said that when you tackled things you feared, your self-esteem soared. How did you take the step from fear to trying it anyway? Was it support from family or friends? Or, did you just steel yourself and try something that made you scared?
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Probablt a bit of both--like jumping into cold water with friends either on the deck or already in the pool to be there if you should need them. No matter how I do it, I think I always assume there is some sort of safety net even if there really isn't.
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